Maternity Leave is NOT Vacation

Moments in life that are monumental: having a child

In January we welcomed our second baby, how has it already been two months!?

Isaiah David Spangler
Born: 9lbs 14 oz. and 21.5 inches long.
At two months: 13lbs 8 oz.
He is a BIG little guy, healthy and growing.

(Daddy meets Isaiah)

(Judah meets his baby brother)

(Mommy and Isaiah bonding in the hospital)

The first month of having a new baby is hard. It's full of blessings too, don't get me wrong, but it is HARD. And just like everyone told me, having two is not twice as much work as one...it's like 3 or 4 times as much work. But two months in we are settling into a fluid routine, at least he seems to know when it's night (finally). I think that's as good as it will get for the time being. I am reminded once again that maternity leave is NOT vacation...and yes, I did have several people tell me to have fun on my break. As if healing from major surgery while caring for an infant and a toddler can be classified as "a break" in any way.

(Our family of four)

There are days that just keeping myself and Isaiah alive are all I can do, and I give thanks for Brett who takes care of the rest. There are days when I am overwhelmed with frustration, days when I can't keep the cranky off my face, there are days when I wonder how I managed to keep up with my ministry with all that needs done, and now there are two kids! But there is also so much joy, daily reminders of why it's all worth it, moments full of fun, and looking forward to all that being a family of four will mean.

(Intrigued with each other)

Regarding having a newborn in the house...it's only been two and half years but I've forgotten so much! So I'm learning how to breastfeed again, and relearning that nursing is a choice I've made that is both very hard to do and very hard to stick with. I'm relearning how squirmy newborns are when changing diapers and changing clothes and getting baths, and that little boys pee on you as often as they can. I'm relearning how painfully tired you can be and still have duties to perform. I'm relearning that there are deep sorrowful moments where I think, "I can't do this!" And I'm also relearning that there are deep joyful moments where I can't believe I created this miracle.

(One month pictures)

There are brand new things too: like how sweet Judah is in a totally different way, and how my heart can split and grow in a way I never thought was possible (before Isaiah was born I often thought, "my God, how will I love this one as much?"). And this time I'm mourning moments as they go by, since Isaiah is our last one, and taking mental pictures to remember both the challenge and the joy of these early days.

(Daddy and Isaiah)

So, how is Judah dealing with all of this? Mostly like a champ. He LOVES his brother. When we got home from the hospital he was very disappointed that Isaiah would not be sharing his room. He talks to Isaiah all the time and occasionally will say, "Mommy, he's not talking to me" or "he won't look at me." He gives Isaiah hugs and kisses and brings him toys and other things he thinks his "brudder" will like. He is such a great helper and encourages us in the ways that we can help his baby (yes, HIS baby): "Mommy, I think Isaiah wants a drink from your tummy"..."Daddy, I think my baby needs a toy"...and he comforts Isaiah when he cries (like one day in the car), "Don't worry Isaiah, we'll be home soon."

(Judah "burping" Isaiah like mommy does)

We really haven't had any of that hatred-of-new-baby from him. The only thing that indicates that he notices how much Isaiah has disrupted how we functioned before is his dislike of me on occasion. There was a short time period in those first few weeks when Judah wouldn't have anything to do with me. He wouldn't let me hug him or kiss him or get him things. Why does no one tell you that when you bring home baby #2 that baby #1 will hate you? I sobbed to my parents and Brett and cried myself to sleep several times because of this. As he's gotten used to Isaiah being around and needing mommy though, that has gone away, he's my loving little boy again. And Brett and I try to share the time so that Judah never feels slighted by me, though this does mean that there are times when Isaiah has to wait a few minutes to eat or cries to daddy for a little while, but these are the challenges of having more than one child.

(Our happy little guy)

As might be expected, my emotions have been all over the place. And while I am not dealing with postpartum depression like I did with Judah (I'll talk about that in a later blog), it is still a daily choice to be calm and loving and rational because there are moments when I feel none of those. The reminder to hold on comes from places like when Brett lovingly reminds me how much joy we have - and he's right. I'm married to my best friend, I have two beautiful boys, we have a warm house and food to eat and a supportive family. The reminders also come from things like late night nursing sessions when I become aware of how much I am needed by my newest baby and from grocery store declarations of love from my two year old in the middle of the produce aisle.

(Two month pictures)

Through this, I am reminded once again what a blessing it is that I get to be a mother, not everyone has that ability/chance/opportunity. So even in the midst of sleepless nights, toddler tantrums, crazy emotions and chaos...I give thanks to God for this life and for the opportunity to be called "Mommy."

A Change of Plans

Status: 39 weeks, 2 days
Baby: Huge...probably over 10 pounds and growing daily

(This is what a very pregnant Shannon looks like - even Judah is surprised!) 

Well, here we are several days from the due date. We went to see the doctor on Friday and she told me, "we'd better take that baby."  Even though this baby is enormous, and maybe bigger than they think,  that kind of change of plans this late can really mess with your mind. I pretty much cried all day Friday.

The safest thing for both of us at this point is a C-section, which we have scheduled for tomorrow morning.  To say I'm anxious is an understatement. I know it's more and more common, I know a lot of women who have done childbirth this way, and I remember how physically traumatic my first delivery was (check out this post about it: The Good, the Bad and the Ugly)...but I'm still anxious.

A positive is that it is nice to be able to make plans...today for instance we're doing a last fun day with Judah, one last day as a family of three. From tomorrow on we'll be four.

Let me admit something, I'm excited to meet this little boy, but I'm mourning our little family of three. We know how things work, we've got a rhythm. I'm also freaking out about being able to love this new kid as much. I love Judah so much, what if I don't love this one as much? What if he's not as cool as Judah? What if Judah doesn't like him?

Just sharing some of my many anxieties with you...this is a short one, I just wanted to update you all on what's happening. We would appreciate your prayers tomorrow for safety for baby and for me.

(Our last day as three)

9 months and Merry Christmas!

Status: 36 weeks (9 months)
Baby: (According to my OB) large, 80th percentile

 (Baby Spangler #2 at 34 weeks)

I know I haven't blogged very much with this one, it's been a fairly normal pregnancy. In addition to that, when you have a two-year-old running around with you and a full time job, your time is not your own. I'm doing what I can!

I need to be real honest, when you're nine months pregnant it is hard to focus on or care about anything else. It's hard to care about the things that are going on in the world. It's hard to focus on your job. It's hard to care about what how your house looks. It's hard to care how about you look. 

(Very pregnant Momma and Judah cuddling)

And my gosh I'm so uncomfortable. But, as if I don't already feel enormous, everyone who sees me wants to remind me that I look like I'm about to pop (or asks me if there's more than one baby in there). Sigh...no I'm not about to pop, my due date is still 4 weeks away. But I am cranky and sore and big, so I really appreciate those comments. And I've hit that sweet spot where I'm so emotional that I cry constantly, when I'm sad or when I'm mad or when nothing in particular is happening. So, I'm a delightful ball of crazy right now. My apologies for those who have to deal with me.

For example, I woke up from a nap this week (because I'm nine months pregnant I need a nap in order to be able to function) and cried when my alarm went off. I called Brett and that amazing man gave me a three-minute motivation. I kept saying I can't… I can't…I can't...and he said, "Maybe not, but WE can." I've said it before and I'll say it again, I truly don't know how people without a supportive partner do it.

But enough complaining! I'm excited to meet this little guy and complete our family of four. Our little Judah is super excited about his baby brother too. He talks about him all the time, he's bought him gifts, and he's really thoughtful about what will happen when "my baby" comes (he has taken on the new baby as his own). Judah has chosen toys to share with him and foods he wants him to try. It's pretty adorable. I showed Judah the most recent sonogram and he said, "I can't wait to hug him and kiss him and share my raisins."

As far as Judah goes, he's doing well. He's two and half now and is such a funny, intelligent little guy. We feel truly blessed. There are so many funny stories I could share but let me just give you one example. We were changing clothes for bed and I left him in a diaper to get some jammies and he yelled, "Mommy, I found something on my body!" He seemed genuinely concerned. I looked where he was pointing and I said, "Well Judah that's your nipple. You have two. Everyone has nipples." He looked down at it and said in the saddest voice I've ever heard, "Oh....I don't WANT a nipple!" Too cute.

Well, we are looking forward to sharing our newest edition with you soon. In the meantime, Merry Christmas, friends!

(Judah, Christmas 2016)

It's a Boy! Again!

19 Weeks and 4 days (144 days left!)
Weight: Over half a pound (a big one just like Judah!)
Healthy and active! 

We are having another baby and we could not be more excited! The blog is up and running again so you can keep track along with me if you'd like for baby #2, which could also be called last baby (just to get a jump start on all of those delightful month-after-baby-comes questions: when are you going to have another?? We're not.)

Baby Spangler #2 is a boy! A little man for Judah to play with and brothers to grow together! We are so excited. I also am officially and forever outnumbered, three boys and mama.

Something I can't get enough of this time around is the term "advanced maternal age" which comes up A LOT! The high risk doctor (since I'm SO OLD I had to go), said it about twenty times in the appointment today. I get it bro, I'm old.

I have heard over and over again each pregnancy is different and how true it is! This time, after only six weeks that belly popped right out. Last time I was 4 months when I started showing. I've thrown up a whole lot less this time, which is a plus. Being pregnant with a toddler at home is exhausting though. Last time I could rest if I was tired, this time there is a two year old who wants to play or needs to eat. 

(Only 8 weeks!)

Naming a second baby is hard because you have to follow the same rules as the first one. In our case: Biblical first name, not too popular but not too weird. Second name that honors a loved one. We'll get there eventually, we've got time. Judah has given many good name suggestions, the best of which are Chewbacca, Goofy and Nana. The other ones are a little less acceptable like "baby" and "fall down" (because "I push him"). 

One of the things that we read was that when you have other children at home you should refer to the baby as "our baby" so that the other kids take ownership and feel like they are a part of what is happening. This has worked so well with Judah that he mostly refers to the baby as "my baby." Last night he said, "Mommy, how is my baby? Baby growing in your tummy?" And he talks about being able to play with him and show him the toys downstairs. This is good because Judah's initial response to having a baby brother or sister was "No, no, no thank you, no, no."

As you can probably guess we're both very excited and very terrified, and are anticipating baby #2 at the beginning of the new year. Keep connected here for more info as I grow! 

I get to be a mommy

Holding my baby boy and looking into his eyes, it would be easy to forget the pain of years of uncertainty, inability to get pregnant, a miscarriage, and general frustration. But it's important to me that I remember that pain. I need to remember that there are people out there who are still struggling, who are frustrated, who are heart broken. It's important to me that I recognize the amazing blessing it is just to be a mommy, because not everyone gets that chance.

Last week I had lunch with a friend and we talked about how not enough people talk about the negative/painful/frustrating side of child bearing, and it's so common.

Even within my small circle of friends there is a couple who lost a full term baby (complications during the birth), a couple who can't have kids, multiple miscarriages (in multiple couples) and a couple whose child has a chronic illness. And that's just several families. There are so many things that can go wrong at so many junctures just trying to bring a kid into this world. And once that kid is here, holy cow...there are so many more things that can happen, so many opportunities for heartbreak.

Here's my point...I get to be a mommy. What a rare blessing!

Sure, I puked at least once (and sometimes more) every day I was pregnant. I had major heartburn (no wonder - that baby was hairy). And I felt like a whale. But I get to be a mommy.

Yeah, the birthing process was rough, and there are body parts which are just never coming back from that. But I get to be a mommy.

I never get more than (at best) 5 hours of sleep in a row. I have been pooped on, peed on, and puked on numerous times. Judah drools like a champ, and while playing I often get spit on my arm, face, clothing, and occasionally in my mouth. My house is never as clean as I want it to be, my work is never as done as I want it to be, and I am never as put together as I would hope to be. I have scratches on my face, my neck, my arms and my chest from his tiny razor nails and I  have lost so much hair to those tiny hands...

BUT, I get to be a mommy. I get to be a mommy...

Maybe it's good that it took us so long to get pregnant...because I know what a rare blessing it is. Every single day I thank God for my Judah and for the time I get with him - no matter what that means. I get to be a mommy, I get to have this beautiful boy in my life. Thank you, God, what a blessing. I pray that I never forget what a gift this baby boy is. There are so many people who can't have children or who have lost children, and I get to be a mommy.

Settling into our new life

We have been home for two weeks (I spent a lot of time in the hospital for some complications) and we are settling into our new life as a three-part family. It's not easy, but it's wonderful.

One of my dear friends told me this when I was feeling anxious about being a mom and having a kid a few months ago: "Your job, your one job the first few months: keep baby alive." She told me, "don't make yourself crazy...keep baby alive." I didn't realize how much I would need this bit of advice.

Everything seems overwhelming right now, and everything seems to be too much, and my emotions are crazy, and I don't know how I'm going to work as well as have a kid, and Judah wants to eat all the time, and I'm not getting enough sleep, and I don't know how to fix it when he cries...

And then I remind myself to calm down: keep baby alive. That I can do...he's fed, he's warm, he's loved. Baby is alive, so even if he's crying, it's probably ok. Even if I'm crying, it's probably ok. It is overwhelming, but it will be ok. I'm trying to remind myself of that, some days I have to remind myself more often.  

Keep baby alive, love baby, feed baby: this is my job right now, and it's full time. This is why it's imperative that people take time from work when they have a baby - it's not a vacation or a break (what a laugh), it's necessary. And I'm doing it, of course with the help of my amazing husband Brett. So really, we're doing it, and we're settling into our roles.

I mostly am just a source of food right now, I have trouble even comforting Judah because he can smell that I'm the momma. But I love that time we get together, I pray for him or sing to him or read books to him, sometimes I just talk to him. It's something I already know I'm going to miss, I treasure every minute of it.

Sometimes in the middle of the night Judah doesn't want to go back to sleep after he eats, so Brett gets his time with baby - he says he loves that time because that's his time with Judah. Brett takes Judah into the nursery to rock him and let me get some sleep.

Today I introduced Judah to the greatness that is the Beatles. He loved it (of course), we danced and I sang to him with John, Paul, George and Ringo in the background for half an hour until he was lulled into a beautiful Beatles induced slumber. Train up a child, right?

So...we're figuring out how to take turns, who does what, and how to live in this new life.  I honestly don't know how people do this without support. I feel so blessed with an amazing husband and an amazing family.

Here is a glimpse into the cuteness that I get to experience: the bond of daddy and son.

Monumental: Had a Baby!

We welcomed Judah Mitchell Spangler into the world on May 27, 2014 at 8:13pm. 

Judah was 5 days early, but right on time for us. We are delighted to be parents, although it is still a bit surreal to say that we have a kid! 

His name: We wanted to have an Old Testament name, we had a long list that we pared down over the months and finally got down to two names: Levi and Judah. As we got closer and closer to his due date we both separately decided that Judah was the name. Judah means "praised." His middle name is in honor of my Uncle Mitch - an amazing man who has been a huge part of our life. 

His weight: He was born at 8lb 2oz, a little smaller than estimated, proof that sonograms aren't perfect (thank goodness!). I was so concerned about having a monster baby and he's the cutest little thing! And of course, he lost weight as all babies do, but is back up to birth weight this week.

His demeanor: He is a funny little guy who is always looking either terrified or skeptical, this is highly amusing to us. He's also always impossibly cute. He seems to be a pretty content little guy: he likes the outdoors, rocking in his swing and staring out the window.  He sometimes enjoys it when you sing to him, and of course he like eating ;)   

Our little man is an amazing gift from God. We wanted him so badly and tried for so long and we are so delighted to have had this opportunity/experience to get pregnant and to be pregnant...and now we look forward to the experience of being a family. Brett and I love being a couple and the life that we have...please continue to pray for us as we figure out life that is totally different now, and awesome in a different way.  We love this little guy more than we can explain and are delighted to now be a family of three. 

Want to keep up with Judah and our family? Stay tuned right here! 

Argh!

Today we are in the single digits...9 days till due date! Holy COW!

I don't have a lot to say, so let me just put this:
* Our check lists are done...we are as ready as we can be
* My heartburn is out of control
* My feet and ankles are so swollen I have to have ice packs and many pillows under them at the end of every day - cankles are real people
* I am going to miss feeling him move around when I'm resting at night
* I'm so ready to know who this person is that has been living with me

That is all for now...

Swollen and Ready

We are now a mere 12 days from our estimated due date. Things are getting crazy! Here's what I look like: 

We went to the doctor Monday and baby boy is estimated at 8lb 9oz already! This is a big boy, this also means that all of those cute newborn clothes are not going to fit our mammoth baby (they go up to 8lb). I have started having swelling in my hands and feet, I had to take off my wedding rings because they were cutting into my finger and bruising it. I feel a little weird being out with no rings on after 9 years! Also, I can only wear flip flops, which do NOT look cute with every outfit in case you were wondering. 

So, I need to confess...I have to retract my statement about wanting baby boy to stay put until the due date. It just happened Sunday but I am ready for this boy to come out. It's hard to walk, hard to drive, hard to sit, hard to sleep...so it's time. I know I said he could stay in until June 1, but let's go baby...anytime now would be good. 

Vanity, vanity...I wanted to look nice for all of the picture taking that is going to be happening because of this major life event so I went tonight to get a haircut.  Let me be clear with you, don't do something like that this close to a major life event. Just don't. Not only was it the weirdest longest haircut of my life (1 hour 20 minutes! and not at a beauty school) but it is the second worst haircut of my life (the worst one was from a beauty school incidentally). Truly. I'm not sure how this guy has a license. I got in the car and sobbed all the way home. So now I look horrible for my baby boy's appearance into the world. I know it sounds really minor and petty, but I'm actually terribly sad about this.

Of course, then I get home and get a call from Brett reminding me just how blessed we are. He's such a good partner, I am truly grateful for him in my life, always keeping things in perspective. I'm still sad about my hair but ultimately in the big scheme of things, life is great, and Brett offered to buy me a beanie and I'll just wear a beanie like the baby. That may honestly be the best option...

Amazing Things

We are down to 18 days...holy cow! In some ways I feel like it's been forever since those first few months where I felt so very very sick, in other ways I feel shocked at how quickly we've gotten here. No matter if he's early, on time or late we will be a family of three within the month. Honestly it feels so surreal, I know that this active little guy in my belly is real but I also feel completely unable to process that he is going to be living at our house soon (and not in me).

We've been getting ready for the better part of a year now, doing little things here and there and more recently taking care of pretty big things but we are finally ready (well as ready as we can be!). Tonight we added a little flourish above his crib: 

"We'll bring a child into this world, we'll say one thing everyone should hear: you were meant for amazing things," it's a lyric from one of Brett's favorite bands Sleeping at Last in their song "Umbrellas." We want to encourage our little guy, we believe that God created each one of us for a purpose. What will his be? We can't wait to find out...(and now I'm crying again!)  

We can't wait to meet you little boy...

The Shannon Whale

We are now at 36 and a half weeks...and here's the thing:

I feel like a whale. It happened all of a sudden but I feel big, I look big, people tell me I'm big (because they think I might NOT be aware?) and...AND I gained three pounds this week.  I've been moving fairly slowly as far as weight gain goes over the pregnancy but I'm at that stage where you have to go to the doctor every week and from last Monday to this Monday I gained 3 pounds! WHAT!? Oh my goodness, I feel big.

And maternity clothes are not meant for people in their last month, I'm convinced. They fit me fine after the belly grew but now my maternity dresses are too short, my maternity pants won't stay up (saggy butt syndrome), and my maternity shirts are riding up. This just encourages my feelings of whaley-ness (it's a word, don't judge). So I have taken to wearing XL T-shirts at home that are comfy but just add to my feelings of whale despair. Sigh*

And baby boy is big too, last week they estimated him at about 7 pounds, ALREADY 7 pounds, how large is this kid going to be at 40 weeks? He's not only large, he's also very active, maybe he's just trying to get comfy? But baby boy is so very active, Brett will just sit by me and watch my belly move around at night. This boy moves constantly! It's a pretty amazing thing really. Brett will say, "he's going crazy!" and I'm like, "Nope, that's my life right now." He's a mover and shaker!

Here is a picture from the last sonogram (last week).  He is facing the camera 3/4 and the upper left is his hand on his cheek:

Body Parts

I am now at 35 weeks, coming down to the wire...last week we started our weekly doctors appointments where they check to see how things are progressing. I asked her if there is any way to keep that little boy in until June 1 because I am a control freak and have very specific plans.  She laughed and said, "No matter what people tell you, there's no way to speed them up or slow them down.  Babies come when they are good and ready." So it's time to start wagers on when he's coming!

Over the last few weeks the baby has grown quite a bit and I can finally distinguish body parts that are moving my tummy constantly (this boy is ACTIVE). It is bizarre to know that the thing sticking out of the side of your tummy is a foot, I had that experience last week. I can identify body parts...how weird!? And yet, how amazing.  I definitely cried, who's surprised? I think Brett is better at figuring out what things are though, my sense of knee vs. foot is off sometimes.

Brett and I went to a movie the other night, we've been dying to go but I was so nervous about being uncomfortable, but we went anyway.  Baby boy was not a fan of the noise - he seriously was agitated the whole time, squirming around and kicking me (legitimately it was a loud movie - Captain America). But between that, how many times I had to use the restroom and how uncomfortable it was to just sit there...we'll not be going to a movie again until after he's born, but it was a nice date!

And now I'm getting big to the point that I feel awkward and tubby.  I didn't know that was a stage. For awhile you have to keep it secret, and then you WANT a belly so that people will know, and then you have this sweet spot where you're definitely pregnant and people can tell and it's cute and fun, and then you get so big you feel gross and you look dumb in pictures and people are like "woah, you're big." I'm at that last stage...and I know it's only going to get worse over the next 5 weeks. Sigh*

Side note: I know this post is all over the place, but it's been awhile since I posted so there's a lot going on. So here's picture to break the wordy-ness:

We've also been getting everything prepared in the house: washing baby stuff, rearranging (closets, cupboards, etc.), putting together baby items and furniture (ok that one's all Brett), and purging our stuff to make room.  It's been fun and we're close to ready.

It's very surreal at this point, I mean we have all this stuff and I can feel him moving in my tummy and I KNOW that we are having a baby....but the thought of another person living in our house soon is surreal. And this isn't just any person, it's our person...who is he going to be? I'm so excited to meet him! And one of the things that makes it more real is that I think we've finally settled on a name (don't bother asking, we won't tell you), which is fun.  Although if he comes out and looks like a Melchizedek or Abednego or something, we're willing to change it.

Ok, enough info for today...whew! Two doctors appointments this week and 34 days to go!!

Psalm 139:13-16 Oh yes, you shaped me first inside, then out; you formed me in my mother’s womb.
I thank you, High God—you’re breathtaking! Body and soul, I am marvelously made! I worship in adoration—what a creation! You know me inside and out, you know every bone in my body; You know exactly how I was made, bit by bit, how I was sculpted from nothing into something. Like an open book, you watched me grow from conception to birth; all the stages of my life were spread out before you, the days of my life all prepared before I’d even lived one day.

Our Big Baby Boy

We are at 32 weeks, coming down to the end! We went to the doctor this morning and baby boy is doing well, he's just the cutest little guy: on the sonogram he was moving around and we saw him yawn. What a miracle! He's still bigger than average but whereas last time we got a measurement he was in the 78th percentile, now he is in the 61st percentile...a little relief for me. They measured him at 4 lb 13 oz.

I have felt his kicks now for awhile but he is now head down and when he moves he mostly rolling around trying to get cozy...and he moves constantly! No need for this momma to do kick counts, our baby boy is a mover and shaker. There are times when we can feel a leg or his little butt sticking out, awesome stuff. 

We wanted to give a special thanks to all of you who made this past weekend so special. We had two showers in Indiana. We feel tremendously blessed by each one of you and are so thankful for your part in our lives. We know baby boy is going to be so loved!

This is a picture of me, my sister Jennie (and Milo), and my sister Jennifer (and Natania and AJ). My heart is full:

Picture: Baby Spangler

One of the things we have had to do is to go and meet with a high risk doctor, just to keep track of a small concern (nothing to worry about). What's amazing about these visits is that we get a 3D sonogram, I know this is not something most people get and we feel really lucky to have this.  This is a picture of our boy from a few weeks ago (facing right, this is his face):

We think he's beautiful! 

As we were getting ready to go from this appointment, the doctor chuckled and told us how much the baby weighed. We said "isn't that a lot?" And he replied, "Oh yeah, he's a big boy." This along with the child birth classes have sufficiently caused me to be a little horrified about the actual birthing process. But I have been reassured many times that it is all worth it, and I have no doubt that is true.  

Give me Ice

I'm sorry it's been so long since I last posted it has been a long couple of weeks, I've been traveling.  The bigger I get the harder travel is, so the last few weeks have been both exhausting and a little painful.  Baby boy is getting so big my organs are getting squished, and the good news from the doctor is that I just have to deal with it. Fantastic.

I've hit the 30 week mark! Which means only 10 short weeks before we get to meet this little guy who we are so curious about! He is kicking up a storm and healthy and growing, so we are happy.

It seems to me that normal pregnant woman have cravings.  I haven't had any of those weird cravings you hear about but I do want one thing constantly: ice. Anything with ice is good; ice cream, milkshakes, slushies, cups of ice to chew, popsicles, drinks full of ice, etc. What's weird about this is I usually hate ice. I don't like it in my drinks (waters them down), I've never been able to chew ice (hurts my teeth), slushies give me brain freeze...so this is definitely a new development. And it's not because I'm hot - I'm still cold all the time, but I want ice, and I want it bad.

Slushies specifically are gold to me right now. I know for a fact I could down gallons of slushie every day if it was available to me and until a few weeks ago I wasn't too picky about the kind. But then Brett introduced me to the Wild Berry Lemonade slushie from Speedway gas stations. Three glorious days in a row I had 44 ounce Wild Berry Lemonade (WBL) slushies, it was wonderful. Then we got home from our trip and discovered that for whatever reason (I'm convinced it's a personal vendetta of some kind), the Mahoning Valley Speedways don't believe in Wild Berry Lemonade slushies.

In a desperate attempt to feed my addiction, since then I have tried many types of slushies from many places. There a few that are ok - but they in no way compare to the glory of Wild Berry Lemonade.  Sigh*

Now I wait for the day about once a week when my wonderful husband picks me up a WBL slushie on his way home from ball testing because there is a place out that way that has them, and I am ever so grateful for this amazing man.

Here is a picture of my belly as well as an almost finished WBL slushie - that was a good day:

Give me a minute to complain...

I am into my third trimester this week. Wow!! And I know it's glorious and amazing and a miracle to get to have a child and I truly believe all of those things but I want to complain for just a minute...if you don't want to hear pregnancy complaints don't read this post. Fair warning.

1) My liver hurts (well I think it's my liver)...like all the time. Is it just being squished? Is it growing too? What's happening there? I try to push it down out of my ribs and stretch to make it feel better but for the most part it feels uncomfortable. I don't like it. 

2) I now have heartburn, I knew it was coming. Everyone says it was coming and now here it is, burning it's way up my chest all the time. Don't eat large meals, don't eat things with lots of spice, eat slowly, don't eat fried stuff or caffeine or acidic foods...I get it, but you can't avoid everything. 

3) This may be TMI but it is my blog, so whatever...I have to pee constantly. CONSTANTLY. I can't sleep for more than two hours at a time. I always have to look for the restroom when I get somewhere. Road trips take forever. Plus it's costing a ton in TP. 

4) My motivation/energy level is super low, like all of the time. It makes me feel useless and guilty. Not much else to say on this topic. Just not how I'm used to functioning. 

5) I can't take hot baths or long or hot showers...which just in general is sad because sometimes you just want to relax but this winter has been COLD, like extra cold. And all I want to do sometimes is warm up but no can do. 

Ok, I'm done...I do love being pregnant and I am excited about what is coming, but being pregnant is not super easy and it is not fun all of the time. Someone needs to tell it like it is. 

Things I can no longer do...

In some ways it feels like I've been pregnant forever...those sick days back in October and November where I couldn't keep anything down, couldn't move and cried constantly seem so far away. But in other ways I can't believe how time is flying. I am 25 weeks already! At 27 weeks I'll be in my third trimester already.

Baby boy is so very active! This week I've felt like a scene out of "Alien." I feel him moving a little the rest of the day, but when I sit down for the night the real fun begins. I lay back and just watch my belly roll  like the kid is trying to get cozy in bed, flipping and flopping. When he kicks my whole tummy jumps and then it just moves consonantly.  I guess he's making up now for the time when he'll be too cramped to move. It's delightful and funny!

So my list of things I can't do anymore (or am having significant trouble with) is growing and growing, here are a few that are particularly frustrating: 

1) Put on my socks, shoes, boots, etc (I'm consider just wearing flip flops even though it's winter)

2) Shave my legs in the shower

3) Sit upright at a desk for more than a few minutes (or sit upright at all, I have to lean back to be comfortable)

4) Open doors without hitting the belly 

5) Zip my coat 

6) Reach high shelves in the kitchen

The thing is...I KNOW that this is only the beginning, it's going to get harder to do things. I'm going to get much bigger and what will I do then? I need to have a personal assistant, haha! I'm only kind of kidding. Brett is tremendously helpful, but since he travels for work there are weeks like this one where I have been very aware of how much he does...and I'm increasing grateful for him.  

Monumental: New Nephew

Moments in life that are monumental:

7) Getting a new nephew

Once again I am blessed to share with you a new life that has come into ours.  My nephew Milo Theodore New was born Tuesday.  It is my brother's first child and he and my sister-in-law are in awe of this miracle. I too am once again amazed at how very quickly you can fall in love with someone. This beautiful little boy is going to be very loved! I am blessed to now have 4 wonderful nephews and 2 beautiful nieces. Here is a picture of me and my brother and Milo:

Baby and the Beatles

This week I have a severe lack of energy - Brett says it's because this is the time when duck baby is growing the most and fattening up (PS. I love that Brett keeps up with pregnancy blogs and info so he knows what's happening and can reassure me when I feel nervous). I do feel like my belly is getting bigger every single day now rather than so slowly, like it was at first.

So, last night we watched the Beatles 50th anniversary special and it was delightful (the Beatles are my favorite) and for the last song, Paul and Ringo sang "Hey Jude," my all-time favorite song.  So I stood by the TV so that baby boy can learn to love the Beatles even now and Brett got some pictures:

PS. So full disclosure: I used my belly to balance some food this afternoon - I'm not proud but there it is.

Pregnant sisters

I am now 23 weeks along, which is crazy to think about, and baby boy is moving around A TON! The other night Brett wanted to feel him moving and so he poked my tummy until the baby woke up. Baby boy proceeded to kick me hard for ten minutes, making my belly jump and then went back to sleep. It's such a fun and amazing thing to experience, I can't wait to meet this little guy who is so very active.

It's also a really fun experience to be pregnant with someone you know.  My brother and sister-in-law are expecting also. In fact they are due on Feb. 20th, so really it could be anytime! It's so fun to journey with someone on this path, and since she's a few months ahead, I am constantly aware of what is coming. This is us in January: